Not even pot can make you this stupid

This week's Concrete Dildo comes courtesy of the Drug WarRant, which found this "Local View" from Sandra S. Bennett of LaCenter, WA.

Long before today's extremely potent strains of cannabis were developed, there were individuals who suffered severe psychotic episodes when smoking marijuana (feral cannabis hemp). In fact, this phenomenon was the basis of "Reefer Madness," the 70-year-old zombie movie about individuals who became crazed from smoking marijuana.

Who needs science when you have zombie movies from the 30s to get your facts from?

Today, pro-legalization partisans complain that "Reefer Madness" and the thousands of scientific studies that document marijuana's many insidious and dangerous side effects, are "just scare tactics" and insist that marijuana be given the same status as alcohol and tobacco.

Actually, we complain that side effects like the munchies and laughing our ass off at MST3K aren't much worse than the side effects of alcohol (occasional bouts of violent rage, sleeping with fat chicks) or tobacco (brown teeth, emphysema) and yet it remains illegal.

Today marijuana is so potent (compare taking 20 aspirin at a time instead of two) that it has become a leading cause of drug related medical and psychiatric emergency room episodes, impacting thinly-stretched medical resources.

Actually, I won't compare it to taking 20 aspirin, because taking 20 aspirin might kill you, but a big fat joint of kind buds will likely only make you sleep till lunch.

Several recent scientific studies have found that marijuana use can indeed cause psychosis and worsen psychiatric disorders. It also causes short-term memory loss, impaired cognitive functions such as attention and judgment; impairs coordination, balance and reaction time; increases heart rate, risk of chronic cough, bronchitis, and emphysema; and increases risk of head, neck and lung cancer.

Short-term memory loss (alcohol), impaired cognitive functions (alcohol), impair coordination (alcohol), increases heart rate (tobacco), risk of chronic cough (tobacco), bronchitis (tobacco), emphysema (tobacco), increased risk of cancer (alcohol or tobacco). Any reason it should be illegal?

Male infertility is also associated with marijuana use. Studies have noted lower I.Q. in children born to pot-smoking mothers.

Myth

Pot smokers have a higher incidence of absenteeism and injury in the workplace. The unemployment rate for drug users is more than 150 percent greater than that of nonusers and drug users typically earn less.

Yeah, like that Soros slacker. Pot really kept him in the poor house.

Marijuana use contributes to delinquency and crime. Society often ends up subsidizing users' housing, food, utilities, medical expenses, and other basic needs. All of these problems would increase dramatically if marijuana were legalized because easy access to marijuana will increase use and addiction just as it has with tobacco.

Wait a second, for you to make that comparison, tobacco would've had to have been illegal at some point. And I won't point out how much tobacco use has gone down over the past 30 years.

At this point, she actually had two paragraphs of factual information (incredible!) and then the nonsense continued...

Marijuana not only plays a key role in auto accidents but is a bigger factor in trucking related fatalities than is alcohol. A well-done study on airplane pilots found that even 24 hours after smoking a low-potency marijuana cigarette, pilots could not land a flight simulator on which they had been trained.

Yes, but what about the 14 martinis they had in the 4 hours right before the test?

The impact of marijuana on American education should be of grave concern. Although tobacco has insidious long-term medical consequences and is perceived to be the greater menace, it does not interfere with the ability to learn.

And it makes you look older too!

Does anyone believe that dumbing down American students, many of whom can now claim they smoke pot for "medical" reasons, will make them competitive in the job market?

Many American students can smoke pot for medical reasons? What, is there some childhood glaucoma epidemic going around?

Special-education teachers are already overburdened with drug impacted children children who come to school impaired by second-hand smoke from the psychoactive drugs used by their parents.

What the fuck? I don't even know what to say any more...

California, with its lax marijuana laws, now mandates treatment instead of incarceration for drug users and it not only is bankrupting the system, but most arrestees don't complete treatment or bother to turn up.

Maybe the solution is not sending potheads to a treatment facility just because they got caught with pot! And it's not like locking someone up in jail costs us nothing either.

Sweden and Japan both tried legalization but suffered dire consequences and reinstituted strong drug policy. Unfortunately, society has a short memory and is often doomed to repeat its most egregious mistakes.

I'm just flat out calling bullshit on that. Neither Sweden nor Japan has tried legalization, but Holland has, and it works.

Legalization would be one of those terrible mistakes that would take generations to undo.

Actually, the Drug War is that terrible mistake that is taking generations to undo. Thanks for contributing to the tidal wave of ignorance that keeps it going.

For a more serious (and footnoted) breakdown of this pile of horseshit, click here.