How to Invest that $35 million

After seeing a post on Talk Left that compared the disaster aid to Florida with the disaster aid to Southeast Asia, it dawned on me that if those affected by this tragedy are smart, they can turn that $35 million into much, much, more.

Here's how.

The areas affected by the tsunami should unite to form a single state, and they should promptly elect Neil Bush as their leader. Neil Bush is familiar with Thailand, and hell, he may even have some kids over there.

The $35 million could then be used to throw a spectacularly elaborate inauguration for him with all the hookers and cocaine he can handle, to give him a sense that he can get away with any kind of obscene excess simply because the people love him so much. Then, in the month after the election, everyone can start complaining about his leadership and talk about how he needs to be replaced because he's not doing enough to help out the tsunami victims, who are still having trouble rebuilding homes, schools, and hospitals. Before you know it, Neil is in Washington securing $2 billion in funding to make sure he can stay in power.